It is all so wonderful and crazy!! :)

I was in Target finally buying clothing for the little one and it was hysterical (I think) watching me and Mom shop for little boy underwear. Mom raised three girls. We were so serious about it all - comparing all the options and my Mom thinking maybe we should also get the little undershirts and it suddenly hit me - he is coming home. I almost sat down in the middle of the store and cried. And the jammies are so adorable. And then there is the grey hoodie that Mom absolutely insisted he needed to be "cool." Me I kept wanting to get the blue-striped shirts but of course Mom is right - he is a little boy and he needs the "get dirty in" clothing. He now has cargo pants with pockets for lots of cool stuff. Yeah!

And I finally let go of taking him the log and fiddlestixs set I found months ago. It is just too heavy. Instead I will take a plastic replacement that is much lighter. And my friend ZoeAnne had gotten him a viewfinder months ago and I made sure I bought many more "films" for all those times we will wait between Vlad and home. It is a quiet game. My little one is an audio processor so I suspect I have already gotten him way too much stuff that will annoy others. Me not so much.

I ran into an old friend who is a bit older last winter who is now married with a young boy. The little one was everywhere and my friend was so patient at entertaining the boy while we waited in a really long line at Petco for our pets. I finally told him as we rounded the corner of the second hour how terrific he was with his son. He smiled at me and said that when we become parents at an older age we more generally tend to have things figured out and may have slowed down enough in life so as to be there for, value, and spend time with our children. I hadn't thought about it before but he might have a point. My life is wonderful and full but aches for a child to be home. And I did finish the orange trim in his room.

And being there for him will be the highlight of life for me. I will be one seriously lucky duck if I am to be a Mom that can be there for him. He is really one cool dude. :)

So now onto the icky things. I do not want people to think I only paint rainbows in the sky because life is not like that. I will do everything in my power to make sure my little has nothing but opportunity and joy in his life but then of course life happens. Even in this glorious time in our lives.

United Airlines (I knew, just knew I should have gone with Aeroflot!!) almost missed ticketing my flights from Portland to Dulles. That was a serious moment of panic tonight. And there was the jaw-dropping behavior of my supervisor last Friday when he denied my leave request under the Family Leave Act. Hard to believe he is an attorney. Anyway the boss changed his mind over the weekend and "granted" the leave request. What a jerk. But it is not like I listened to him anyway. This is my son (maybe) and I will be there no matter what.

And I am getting on a plane to Russia (eventually) on Friday. I cannot wait!!!! Thank you God.