We do Great!!!

Sasha is such an amazing child. Everyday is a new miracle. He gave the post-adoption person an individualized tour of the house in which Mama was ordered to remain in the living room. What a sweetie.

And then I wrote down all we did for the last six months and then what was to come. Oh my goodness. We do a lot as a family. Life is good. And Sash goes back to school soon. We have a study area set-up where he "works" at practicing for school. My mom does all the heavy lifting with that. (Thank you Mom!) He is so cute about how his Mama goes to work and then he works at home. I am so excited because soon he will be able to read the books he carries around the house asking me "what it says" all the time. I have no problem reading books to him (thank you Nancy for the huge dump truck load of kiddie books) but even Mommies need bathroom breaks. :)

So that is how it goes. I put everything on the line to get Sasha home. We then went through a screaming hell. Even now days have bumps. But, at the end of the day it is worth it. And that is while I climb the mountain of our upcoming surgeries.

Believe it or not Sasha is looking forward to it. I collapse in tears every time I have to address it. No lie. Yeah, yeah I know I signed up for the cleft issue but it is currently dropping me to my knees. I carry my child on a pillow - I want to have nothing bad ever happen to him again so even corrective surgery makes me cry. Frankly if anyone knows of a source that can hold my hand when I weep during surgery please tell me about it. I have been even through Sasha thinking monsters coming out of the walls but I am on my knees thinking about getting Sasha through his cleft surgeries.

But Sasha is all about it! His only concern was if I would be there when he woke up. Of course I told him I would be so he is off and badgering all of us about wanting his Mama's lips and teeth. He wants those missing upper fronts! And then he wants the pain in his mouth to stop (he only told me about that recently!!!). It is only in the last week or so he figured out his nose can maybe be bigger (we had a late summer cold with congestion that totally stressed me out) so that is now making Sasha's list. Please pray for the surgeons because Sasha is coming with his list of demands and will probably not be deterred.

I cannot imagine a more perfect child. And God let me be his Mama. THANK YOU GOD. There are not thank yous enough. I pray for all parents waiting for their child to come home. It is such a hard trek to get them here. And then the path at home may be hard. But it is totally worth it!!!

People often say they do not understand how I "do it" or "I am amazing." That is all wrong. I "do it" because a child needs a parent. I only seem "amazing" because I hang in and ride the insanity through. At the end of the day, Sasha is still a child that needed a parent. And God gave me the opportunity be the person to step up and be the Mama Sasha needs. I am so blessed.

And this is a sobering thought - Sasha will be going off to college in a small handful of years. I am so not ready! So maybe after people help me find the cleft surgery support people we can search for the "leaving for MIT - bye Mom" support group. My son is seriously brilliant. I know he will leave home and travel far in his love planes and all things need to be taken apart and "fixed."
That is something I cannot want to see- even if it is through tears. May God Bless All that take time from their days to read this blog. Take care, Mama Sarah

Tomorrow We have our One Year Post-Adoption Visit

How crazy is that! It seems like just yesterday Sasha was tearing through Heathrow on our way home. It seems just like last week I stepped into a minivan in Vlad so as to take the three+ hour ride to Sasha's former orphan home to pick him up for the final time. So tonight I think - what does it all mean? First and foremost - my son is home. For me personally, I find the Russian institutional structure an amazing miracle that saves children.


I think anyone still reading this blog should raise a cheer for us! You should raise that cheer because we survive. This family survives and heals in love. And tomorrow we will have the interview to let all that people in Russia know too. I do not know about anyone else but all the people I met in adopting Sasha will have a place in my heart forever.

Somedays I am just so proud!!!

As some of you may know, being a parent is often a lot of loving while correcting and molding behavior. The redirection of institutional behavior as it combines with PTSD often seems like such an uphill battle. Rewarding but tiring. My son, who is such a survivor has given me many moments of growth opportunities as he reaches new heights.

So it was with much trepidation that I approached the birthday party of a neighbor kid. Sasha and I have been really sick so at the last minute I said no to going to the actual party but we still had the gift. It was so sweet really, Sasha picked out a multi-game package with SpongeBob. I sweated bullets over both this present choice and the fact that it would have to be given away but Sasha came through with flying colors. I wrapped it up with a bow (Sasha had never seen such a thing) and then he carefully walked it over and gave it to the birthday boy. He stayed to see it unwrapped, was happy Jake (the birthday boy) liked the gift and then was able to go back home.

What an amazing boy. And so sweet. Mostly Sasha is about defining boundaries about what is his. And most days what constitutes his is everything in sight. (We are still working on filling those reservoirs of unmet need.) Yet today he gave a gift from the heart with no strings attached and no regrets. I am so proud of my son. He is such an amazing person. My life is so much richer for him.

I am so lucky. I hope that all who read this blog are well. May God keep you close. - Sarah

p.s. Next week we go to my favorite county fair - I cannot wait to see if we bring chickens home! Sasha adores them and I remember taking care of them from my childhood. I am certain we do not do something so rash. :) Or maybe we will. :) Or maybe Sasha will just get a cool cowboy hat like his Mom. Life is good.