Everything That is Given Is Not What I Planned

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Check out the new picture of Sasha !!

It is just to the left and was snapped tonight after we had a wonderful weekend. I also changed my profile picture to one that was taken the first day I met Sasha in Russia. I was so happy. And as Sasha shows today, we are still happy. We deal with stuff but that is what families do. And of course I am his Mom. I am the one that is always there for him. I am the Mom that sits up at night and worries about his stuff. So I have no identity issues there.

I know I have a therapist for the family that flinches when I talk about him having another Mom, but of course he does, and I do not want him to confuse me with her. Unlike most adoptive families, Sasha and I have the same coloring and green eyes. Even in Russia people kept mistaking us for a biological family. And given the extent of everything, I want Sasha to know I did not leave him there in hell - I only came to bring him home. And others in my family, like my dad and older brother, have adopted and I understand how kids need to know. And I am okay with that. And there are still others in my family that were sheared from their heritage and left to drift in American society. That caused a sense of loss I would never give someone I loved. Ultimately, it is a balance. It is a gift a mother gives her child. Something with joy and richness that makes small of the unfortunate parts.

Anyway, back to the weekend. It was great. Finally, I started working on the front yard that is a Portland Oregon kind of thing. I am working on making the entire front yard a flower bed. I have been working on it for a couple of years. I have the white picket fence in and this weekend I worked on trimming everything back, putting in a few new perennials and hanging the gates. Sasha dug out weeds and began a really big hole for the eventual transplanting of the star magnolia tree.

Of course we had to go and buy Sasha outdoor shoes, gloves, a watering can and a little bucket before it could all commence. And then Sasha wanted his own shovel and rake. I can recommend the shovel: it kept him amused for hours. And our yard is doing great. Tomorrow I will work on finishing the transplant site with Sasha and then we will move the magnolia tree from the back to the front. It is still pretty small, but it needs to be moved this year or it will be too late.

Sasha loved it all. He has never really been allowed to go outside and dig. Russian caretakers are so careful about some things - Sasha had never played in the snow or was taught how to deal with mud. He loves it all, it is just so new for him.

And then tonight, he went to bed, no screaming. When I was walking out of the room he said "thank you for the gifts." He didn't need to - and he knows that - he just was happy. Check out the picture.

Good night and God bless, Sarah

2 comments:

Cindy said...

I'm so happy to hear you had some joys this weekend. Vika and I were outdoors doing stuff, too. Yeah, Spring!

Cindy

Carey and Norman said...

I'm so happy for you both. Who knew that yardwork was the therapy Sasha needed all along. It does calm the spirits (for all of us)!

Loved the new picture too!!