I want to thank everyone for all your kind support. Of course it is not my fault and it just underlines the agency problems given that was the respone. Everyone's kind support is so helpful to me as I struggle through getting this all done. And just in case you all do not know MamaSten is the most amazing person I have ever met. So inspiring. While I would say that what I am going through is not impacted whether I am here alone or with a posse, I would say that if I wanted anyone here (other than Mom) it would be MamaSten. That being said she is home with her little ones and being here would not change reality.
It has been hard. Not because I am alone here but it is hard because of the serious and long term ramifications of it all. As if adopting a bi-lateral cleft child was not enough. There is no question, Sasha is still pretty off the charts bahvoir-wise. Everybody sees it. It is not just transition stress or blah, blah, blah but something more. And because the behavoir is off the charts I had to do a lot of thinking the last several days. I love him so much. And he needs help so much. And it is so much work - and we are not even home yet!!!
Tonght we did the american family thing - pretty much. After everything, he took a bath, he refused to sleep, laid down in front of the tv and slept. Thank god. He did not violently rock tonight. That is the worst thing in the world for me to see -that self soothing behavior. I know it is typical for children that have been institutionalized for life but I still do not like it.
So now he sleeps. I so love him so - may God bless us.
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3 comments:
Sarah,
You and Sasha have been in my thoughts and prayers. I'm so thankful that MamaSten was able to help you. I knew she would be a great resource of information especially with boys similar in age when adopted. I know that what you are experiencing must be so hard. The transition to parenthood is hard enough when you don't have to worry with adoption behaviors. You are doing great and just remember that you love Sasha and God chose you to be his mother. He will provide you with the strength and encouragement you need.
I hope your remaining time in Vlad and time in Moscow go well. We are thinking of you and praying for your transition together as a family.
Much Love,
Carey
Sarah - Praying for you and your family. It sounds as though you are handling things very well and making the tough decisions that come with parenting. Take care - Rachel
I promise, it gets better ! My son was a cleft lip/palate in China, adopted at 2.5 and he was a wild child too ! And with my 3rd adoption I was stuck in China alone with a little girl who spoke only chinese for 2 solid weeks, was I glad to get home ! Soon you will be home, give it time, it takes a good 6 months to look back and say thank goodness it's better ! My son's palate was wife open and he ate everything !
Charlotte and crew
www.charlottes4angels.blogspot.com
www.myarcticprincess.blogspot.com
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