A family is just family

Kids and life!  They take up so much time.  My mom is doing better but what that means is too early to tell.  She is awake and she and Alex had a moment today which meant a lot to both of them.  Having him be a part of all of the hospital visits has helped his issues.  I remain convinced that no secrets from kids is the best policy.  I have seen him actually blossom emotionally during this trying family time.  Or maybe it is because he is no longer hit at school.  Being hit or teased really makes him mad.  He has already endured a lifetime of that and will not anymore.  Normal life drama does not faze him.

Alex still fusses around the edges but really, he is being so amazingly awesome.  I wake up crying and stressed which then leaves me a bit snappy because I want to go see my Mom at the acute care unit and Alex just ignores me.  Even when I am upset him he ignores me.  I apologize immediately of course because I would never even be snappy at my miracle children.  Losing a loved one, or almost losing a loved one is so terribly difficult. 

It has been so unexpected.  I buried a parent when I was six-years-old and I thought it was the hardest thing.  This has been harder.  Not because I do not have support or anything but I have just been so unprepared.  And it is my Mom, my last parent.  My kids watch how love of a family member plays out.  My kids, denied a family life for so long, see how it works and why love matters.  They have been awesome about the daily visits.  They also see normal life continue.  I think that is such an important lesson for them to know.

Everyone has to get back up and continue live in moments of tragedy.  My kids knew that fact before they came home but they are now seeing it within a circle love.

The home schooling continues daily and I met with Daria's special ed team today to determine further support.  All in all a good day.

I just want to say that I have been blessed with all sorts of people I know offering to help me.  People from every corner of my life are jumping out to help.  I have even been able to work around everything, from home.  I have just been dealing with a lot of grief.  And looming life changes.    I do not know how to ask for help with grief.  I think I must just have to cry a lot.  So I do and the kids are getting used to the Mama with red, weepy eyes.  They know it is not about them. 

The beloved kids are still having a wonderful time.  Swimming lessons are going wonderfully.  Alex is moving to the next class up already!  Alex is also an absolute whiz at gymnastics.  He is seriously talented at all of it and may even go to the Olympics someday.  I already suspected that since he has been balancing off of the edges of everything for years - just for fun.  And doing backflips over the furniture.  Oh my.

And Daria has discovered hip hop.  She cannot remember all the steps but she loves it.  She breaks out in dance every time she hears music.  When she listens in to Russian radio on my Iphone (which I listen to a lot) she is filled with joy.  My daughter destined for the Broadway stage.  :)  We are a happy family.  We are the lucky ones.  We found one anther.