New Surgery - new milestone

Alex had another reconstructive surgery last week.  For any parent that has had a child have to endure extensive, painful and invasive medical procedures, the fact that the child does not simply run down the hallways and streets screaming no more, no more is the inspiration that keeps us by their sides. 

Alex had a hard surgery.  So much scar tissue from the before time makes reconstruction slow going. 
The surgery itself went great.  Of course everything we discussed beforehand was not what the doctors did.  Instead they rebuilt the back of Alex's palate and he sounds normal.  He even snores.  Alex is so freaked out by the change he is staying home until he gets used to the normal sounds of his voice. Alex is also so seriously offended by the pain post-surgery.  It makes him so mad.  When Alex is mad at the painful assault on his body he tells us and then endures.  So sweetly he makes me weep.

My miracle boy. 

All of us in his home life see such a wonderful boy.  School remains a problem, but not because of Alex.  The medical doctors now want to talk to the school.  The mental health doctors want to talk to the school.  Even Alex's speech therapist wants to talk to the school.  Why you may ask?

It is because they are totally confused, and now less than pleased, as to why there is still a problem at school.  Not me, but them.  Our miracle boy is normal, but fragile.  So, I have been retaining attorneys.  I have been trying to understand the legal ramifications about how Alex is being failed by the public institution called school. 

Because of the surgery, Alex is of course in the driver's seat about how he re-enters school.  He decided the first day back and a kid rushed him coming into the room.  He did not like it.  Later this kid raced Alex back into the classroom and shoved him out of the way.  Nobody at school thought anything about it even though he is in a fragile classroom. 

They told me it was not bullying.  I did not say it was.  I told the teacher Alex, as a result of the extreme bullying before, simply cannot endure invasion of his personal space - especially in an aggressive manner.

The school re-entry attempt day pushed Alex to his limit.  Not because it was post surgery but because the environment is simply wrong.  Lacy, my friend and right hand, had Alex on the phone, with the teacher yelling in the background telling Alex he "had a good day!"  Alex was also yelling - almost incomprehensive - and so terribly explosive.  The teacher was using such a negative tone as she was telling Alex his day was good. Me on speaker phone and my right hand girl, got him out of the room while the teacher talking down to Alex.  Once out of the classroom he calmed down long enough for the 5 minute car ride to the house where my mom took over.

I asked for a next day meeting and reminded them he is currently fragile because the school district allowed him to almost be bullied to death.  No meeting was allowed.  The teacher then took the day off.

Alex remains a fragile child trying to live.  I am the Mom charged by God to make it so this sweet, gentle child can be allowed to live.

I go to mediation tomorrow with a mediator who seems to be a school district puppet.  He tried to scare me about litigation and then attacked me personally.  If I didn't have over 25 years experience in litigation that attack would have destroyed me.  No joke.  My support team and family gave me a lot of room to rebound from that attack.   He is also a part-time judge so now I wonder how many other people he has unfairly commenced a frontal assault against which is only tangentially attached to law.  I keep having attornies address and limit the damage being done.

God gave me a large issue to live through.   The lawyers are expensive.  And I worry about the water bill.  And then I worry about the holidays.  So much money is going to trying to stem the tide damage.  I worry it the kids will get any holidays at all.  Attorneys cost a lot of money.

None of it Alex's fault.  He is doing what he needs to do.  He is surviving painful and extensive reconstructive surgeries with the most amazing demeanor.  And he is eating way too much ice cream and spending time with his doting grandmother who thinks the sun rises and sets with him.  Alex does not know how hard every day is to keep him safe and secure.

Prayer is how I keep going.  I ask that someone pray for us tomorrow I go to the mediation.

The rest of the family needs to be kept in your thoughts too.  We are a family strongly built through adoption. 

God has blessed us all.