Everything That is Given Is Not What I Planned

Saturday, October 6, 2012

A happy life

I went to a religious retreat this weekend.  It had nothing to do with the kids or any issues from this summer.  It was just for me.  It is something to renew my soul and reaffirm my faith in God.  It was for me to simply have joy in faith.

Some people who know me would be shocked to hear I am so deeply religious.  I want to say, really?!?!?  How do you think I kept climbing into that ambulance and how do you think I kept living in the hallways of ERs?  How do you think I kept going on when the doctors gave me no hope?  I have faith, in God.  And loving that sweet child of course kept me by his side in the darkest hours. 

He is a sweet child.  When he is not being forced beyond his own ability to cope.  I have learned things about what happened to him - at school.  Things I wasn't supposed to ever know.  Attorneys have been retained.  It will be resolved.  That being said, my child is back.  He has returned to us in all his little boy glow.  Or maybe that is just mud from playing too hard outside!  The happy life is back. 

Back to the retreat or conference.  Saturday I got everyone up and tried to get ready to leave.  My kids clung.  I had not gotten home before they went to bed the night before because of the conference.  They missed me.  There is no better feeling for an adoptive mom than to hear, and feel, that her kids miss her.  Needless to say, I was late. 

The day reaffirmed my faith.  Not that I needed it, but is nice to hear others talk about faith.  Alex is my miracle that I found in Russia and God has reaffirmed the preciousness of this child.  A child people once again saw as lost was again found. 

I am not sure if Alex knows that he is such an amazing miracle.  He is just a boy.  He is a happy boy.  He had a great time at home with my Mom while I listened to stuff to make my heart happy.  I then went home and we all went to the park to play.  A happy life.

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